Cerpen Bahasa Indonesia, Lits/Sastra

Hati Penuh Gores

Ia lambaikan tangannya pada anak-anaknya.

Seperti hari-hari lainnya, ia berangkat kerja dan keberangkatannya akan dilepas oleh ibunya dan kedua anaknya yang masih kecil-kecil. Kadang anak-anaknya sudah mandi karena bangun pagi sekali. Kadang masih berpakaian tidur lengkap dengan rambut semrawut dan kotoran kecil-kecil yang bertengger di matanya.

Tak peduli bau asam khas anak belum mandi, ia akan ciumi satu-satu anaknya. Satu di ubun-ubun sambil bisikkan doa, satu di kening sambil ucap sayang, dan di kedua pipi sambil bilang assalamu’alaikum.

Meski berat ia paksa kakinya berjalan. Terus berjalan. Menjauh dari rumah. Sesekali ia akan menoleh sebelum menghilang di belokan. Kemudian, ia akan mulai merasakannya. Satu torehan kecil lagi di hatinya. Torehan yang muncul setiap meninggalkan anak-anaknya di rumah untuk bekerja. Juga dari rasa takut akan hal buruk yang mungkin saja menimpanya atau anak-anaknya.

Lalu, ia akan mulai berdoa dalam hati. Minta perlindungan Tuhan. Supaya nanti sore bisa kembali dengan selamat tuk peluk anak-anaknya yang masih dalam keadaan sehat wal’afiat.

Empat tahun sudah berlalu. Ia membayangkan, berapa banyak torehan di hatinya. Atau mungkin torehan-torehan itu sudah saling menumpuk, sudah membentuk rupa yang semakin tak karuan.

Ia tersenyum getir. Hatinya pasti penuh gores.

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Thoughts

The Wings

Life turned out to be all about facing and solving challenges in every stage of it. Succeeding or solving one challenge doesn’t mean that we won’t face another one in the next stage. Even when we’re giving up and heading to a different direction. Cause, it is never a smooth and constant ground.

The good thing is if we learn enough, we’ll grow through it. We metamorphose.

And, to us all, the tired souls, the exhausted minds and aching bodies, maybe we just haven’t discovered the wings that grow on our back, haven’t realized how beautiful they are.

This may be the time to have a look on them.

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Thoughts

Wound

I thought forgiving was easy.

It had been a sleepless night. I remember gazing through the white ceiling of my room that had gone dark. I was tired, but just couldn’t sleep. Myself reminded me of a baby who was drained of all her energy and yearned for a sleep but ended up only crying all night.

Wondered if day was a man, it might be so devastating to wake up with the reality that night wasn’t as long as it seemed to give him a damn rest. I either needed a rest, but this mind was too rapid to give me what I wanted. Of course, not that memory. I hated it winding up wallowing on this part of my head where I kept all those things ready to dispose. Things I should not have reached any more.

Hated it when it ended up like this.

Sometimes I thought I have forgiven some people, until time like this I realized that I kept remembering things. How I felt, how I’ve been treated, the pain and everything.

Maybe people are right (oh they’re always right). The wound heals, the scar remains.

God.

Thought forgiving was that easy.

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Thoughts

t o u g h


There are some people who are destined to have a tough life. That they grow up to become the one with tougher self. Tougher than anyone else. And, sometimes it turns out not becoming an option for them. They just can’t quit. They just have to deal with it. They just have to be tough. They just have to. Or… They’ll die giving up.

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